Monday, July 14, 2008

Half Glass Full

During my college days, I used to think pessimistically for most things. Though I understand that everything has its ying and yang. I was more comfortable of thinking like a victim, passive and powerless person. As I grow older, has able to possess certain things and achieve power over certain things. I feel I've more control over certain matters. I'm not saying I'm satisfied with everything I have. However, I wouldn't lose sleep over some of them though they are not perfect.

Yes, during natural disasters or in some 'macro' environment changes, human beings are fragile. However, considering the place that I'm living, it is relatively stable and the environment is more or less encouraging individuals to fight for their own. I think I do have power to choose how I want to feel about what I've and what I don't have. Should I feel sad or joyful? That's really up to oneself and we are all welcome to make an effort to change our feeling towards the same thing in future.
Everyone has weaknesses, nobody is exception. I can criticize myself point by point on what a loser I am, feel bad about it and vice versa. I used to think a lot, I love to think, but lately I've been thinking less than before. At this moment of my life, I think 'hard' when I need to. Cos, thinking without planning and actions is just like a hobby or entertainment to me. But, I think I need some subsequent actions in my post-thinking stage. Cos, I'm not very happy with my current stage of life now. I need to brainstorm, do some analysis and then get something going. Sometimes, the pendulum tilt too much to one end, and I realize that it is time to swing back. Staying in the comfort zone created by myself for too long can really make me lazy and give excuse to myself. Happy with one end of the 'half glass full' can really lower a person's expectation of him/herself and letting things deteriorate. When things get to a point of no return and you don't even notice it, it will be too late to make any change.

At the end of the day, what I'm going to do is not really the point, but my thinking process is more important. Cos, the driver of actions are coming from there. I'm going to motivate myself to do something, a life is a like a house, it is time to do some maintenance, renovation, cleaning, and improvement. I don't think I urgently need to do them, but I think I'm smart enough to know that a prolonged inactivity stage will really make things deteriorate, I don't want to wake up one day and find that I'm homeless.....