Tuesday, April 24, 2012


A local celebrity has just come out of the closet and announced to the world publicly that he is gay. I’m just surprised that it is even considered as news these days. Come on, we are in 21st century now! I think anyone, particularly a celebrity, if he/she doesn’t outright clearly declared that he/she is heterosexual after being reported or described by the media as a homosexual, he/she is very likely to be a gay person. For that local celebrity, he has been known to be with the same man for many years in and out in public places. His sexual orientation has been written on the wall already, why the restless people in the press still asked him if he is gay or not when they know the answer already? That’s just beyond me. He is an artist whose owe his audience his works – performance in music and stage, that’s what people should care about. What his sexual orientation is none of the public’s business, that’s at least what I think about the whole situation.

Certainly, I can’t prove what I say here, that’s simply based on what I read and learned all these years in print and in media. From my person’s point of view, these are my thoughts on the subject of homosexuality:

As a behavior, it is not in the majority among human beings. I don’t know if the claim by the gays & lesbian (“GL”) that 10% of human population are homosexuals are accurate or not. To me, whether it is 9% or 11% is not the point. It is very easy to accept that GL is not in majority, otherwise, our human population would not boom as it is now.

It is natural and is something that a person borne with. You either born gay or you don’t. Of course, exhibiting GL behavior or engaging in GL activities are not limited to GL. E.g. some heterosexual actors/actresses could act as GL in movies. That’s part of their job and they got paid doing that. Such exception cases are not what I’m talking about. I think the majority of GL naturally incline to love their own sex. They are not taught that way, they just do that ‘voluntarily’ and feel ‘natural’ to themselves. That’s why I don’t believe in the theory that heterosexual teens can be taught to be gay or GL can be taught to go straight. Cuz, that just goes against their nature. I think it is quite easy to understand that as a heterosexual man myself, it would be enjoyable to kiss a woman, but it would be a displeasure or at least I would not incline to kiss a man given I’ve a choice!

Some people in the majority have an impression that GL are taught and can thus to turn back is mainly because they have seen or known some people who ‘had appeared’ as straight and then eventually ‘turned’ GL. I think that’s a ‘false’ impression. It is because they have discounted the effect of a social environment that created and maintain by the heterosexual majority on the GL minority. GL is different from racial identity which has obvious physical traits. For instance, parents and teachers who are politically correct in race matter will teach kids not to bad mouth people of colors. For whites, they may be careful and a bit sensitive in dealing with blacks in their presence. Also, the issue of skin color is relatively neutral these days that come with less stigma than sexual orientation. However, for a heterosexual family and most k or grade schools, they teach kids what a normal family should look like, what acceptable and normal love relationship should look like. Anything that is out of majority, they are either hidden, discarded or even denounced by the heterosexual leader with authority. For GL kids growing up with a majority of heterosexual kids, I believe that they would have a tougher time to let their natural sexual orientation to develop. They are taught to accept heterosexuality as the only natural and acceptable behavior in the society. Human beings are group animals and want to be accepted by the fellow human beings. Thus, they would choose to behave and act the acceptable way though they may not feel right to do so. That’s why some natural-born GL would marry opposite sex and even have children before they ‘realize’ or ‘discover’ they are actually GL. For them afterwards, it is a matter of choice to stay in or walk out of the closet. Regardless, they are GL by nature. I just can’t imagine that any non-GL would choose to be GL and declare that themselves publicity which would face certain level of social disapproval or at least peer pressure. I think that those GL that go public are at least partially choose to face public pressure but getting mutual support from their gay peers rather than suffocating alone in their closet privately without help.

Furthermore, I believe that sexual orientation itself is neutral and should not subject to moral judgment. Two persons in love should be respected and either straight or gay.

Bring it closer to my home, I’ve not talked to my wife about giving sex education to my sons. I think I would openly discuss all of these to them when they are ready. Some people might question me a scenario that what if my son is gay, would that change my mentioned view on homosexuality? Well, first of all, that would prove that sexual orientation is not taught as I would not teach them to be gay. Basically, I would tell them what heterosexuality and homosexuality are, what the society’s view on them. If they happen to be gay and they choose to tell me, I think I will be shocked first and would take time to digest and ponder. I think the more challenging part is to disclose that to my wife whom I would think a lot of counseling would be needed. At the end of the day, I can’t change the fact that they are my sons by blood. Either I love them as always or ‘disown’ them just because their sexual orientation. I think the answer is pretty obvious.


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