近來互聯網上盛傳一首《諷刺簡體字的歌謠》,不知何人所作。長期以來,大陸內部一直不乏批評簡體字過度簡化字形而喪失原意的聲浪,此次出現諷刺簡體字的歌謠,網友紛紛轉帖並跟帖補充。香港甚至有網頁轉載,改題《諷刺大陸垃圾殘體字歌謠》。
有民眾說,在當今漢字繁簡之爭方興未艾之際,它的出現,為繁體字助威,為簡化字添堵;也有人說,現在用手寫字的沒幾個人,都用電腦輸入了,所以簡體幫助書寫速度沒甚麼大意義了;更有人讚美道:「寫的人真是天才!」讚賞起調侃功力之佳。
諷刺簡體字的歌謠:
細雨蒙蒙(濛)沒有水,開(門)門關(關)門不見門;
烏雲(雲)密佈不下雨,台(颱)風颳(颳)來哪有風?
戰鬥(鬥)英雄戰大鬥,難怪豪傑(傑)不算人;
聽(聽)字有口沒有耳,到底是說還是聽?
采(採)花不須用手摘,相愛(愛)何必獻真心?
白貓(貓)黑豬(豬)皆屬狗,老闆(闆)原是木頭人。
干(幹)部看來都干(乾)癟,會(會)上人云我亦云;
鞦韆(鞦韆)只宜秋季蕩,冬冬(鼕鼕)鼓聲冬日聞。
面(麵)粉不須麥子磨,窮人從此不挨餓;
更有高人好武藝,一棒打去犬成龍(龍)。
讀講說談(讀講說談)不開口,聲(聲)音何須耳朵聽;
「四捨(捨)五入」是什麼?四間房舍五人進。
勸君莫吃豬內臟,內臟(臟)肯定都骯髒(髒) ;
山谷裡面沒太陽,稻穀(穀)在此難生長。
別人盡做別(彆)扭事,買個蘿蔔(蔔)卜凶吉;
工廠(廠)設備都掏光,廣(廣)州也唱空城計。
丑角容貌並不醜,唱曲應在喝曲(麯)後,
鬍鬚(鬍鬚)頭髮(髮)不長毛,不妨試試101
網友跟帖補充
我最不喜歡的兩個簡體字:相愛(愛)沒有心!相親(親)不相見!如何親愛?
漢字簡體化之後;親(亲)不見,愛(爱)無心,產(产)不生,廠(厂)空心,麵(面)無麥,運( 运)無車,導(导)無道,兒(儿)無首,飛( 飞)單翼,湧(涌)無力,有雲(云)無雨,開關(开关)無門,鄉(乡)里無郎,買(买)成鈎刀下有人頭,輪( 轮)成人下有匕首,進(进)不是越來越佳而是往井裏走,只有魔還是魔!
無草無木何生葉(葉),十口齊開長出來。
古怪聖(聖)賢無口耳,曉義 (義)高人似叉燒。
拾貝堆土築大垻(壩),難怪連年鬧洪災。
鳳(鳳)輕如風(風)隨處飄,龜(龜)殘缺爪往哪爬?
紅門一入深似海,從此「蕭」郎是「肖」郎。
「葉」(葉)是植物,卻沒了草花頭,也沒了樹木,難道就憑十個口也可以長出來?
「義」(義)是中國人重視的品質,在簡體字裡卻不知成了「乜叉嘢」(粵語)!
「鳳」(鳳)的鳥身不見了,「龜」(龜)的四肢也被斬斷,醜惡至極!
堤「壩」變成「垻」,只剩泥土和貝殼,令人失笑。
在文革年代,姓「蕭」被強迫改做「肖」,到現在還沒完全糾正過來。
原詩是崔郊的《贈婢》:「公子王孫逐後塵,綠珠垂淚滴羅巾。侯門一入深似海,從此蕭郎是路人。」
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